Nothings The Same ; It's all got too change

So I had the tv on mute and 106 and park was on but I wasn't really watching it and as I look up from my laptop I see stanky leg is #1 on the countdown and all I could do was laugh and shake my head. This would have never happened if Free and Aj were still the hosts of the show. Smh. Damn. It made me think of everything that has changed as I came up.

It went from Free and Aj to annoying (_!_) Roxy and Terrance.
It went from well put together and thought out cartoons
such as Rugrats to bull shii (_!_) cartoons like Wonder Pets.
BTW WTF IS A WONDER PET? SMH *SIGH*
It went from having friends of the different sex to friends just wanting to have sex.
It went from having talent and getting signed to just having a catchy hit single
and getting signed.
It went from living life without having a care in the world to people judging you for being your self.
It went from standing out to blending in.
It went from being able to trust your best friends with your biggest secrets
to having to watch what you say and do because now-a-days anyone will betray you.
It went from believing in Happy Endings portrayed in Disney Movies to being brought to the realization that everything is not as Happy as it seems when it ends.
It went from people being in love with each other to people just being in love with the thought of being in love.
It went from a Hello to a Farewell :'( (sorry ya'll that one was kind of personal)
It went from being ecstatic and hesitant about growing up
to being scared to face reality when you realize its not all its cracked up to be.

iFell in love with a Heartbreak :-) :'(

Dang Kanye finally got me trapped in his singing lol
As of today I officially love the whole 808's and heartbreaks album.
I'm listening to it as we speak.
It all started a few days ago when I heard "Welcome to Heartbreaks" then I listened to Heartless but this time around listening to it was different. See before I just would find it annoying but this time I found it catchy and well put together then it was pinocchio story then see you in my nightmares then the rest just didn't seem that bad too me anymore. Damn who would of thought i'd come around to liking it. Ok kudos Kanye you got me. Me and my bestie boi(whom I will miss dearly now that he's no longer in cali) was quoting all types of clever lyrics from it today sheesh Kanye is just too clever.

2.24.09

Damn,
Today's the Day.
I knew its been coming for about a month now.
I've been trying to be strong for you because I know,
you've been being strong for both me and you and everybody else.
You probably won't be reading this anytime because i'm sure I won't tell you
to read it until I feel i'm ready for you to read it and today is not the day
because i'm not trying to make you get anymore emotional than this whole thing has already. Shii but I still remember the day you told me and I shed tears right then and there. I never imagined you leaving Cali just up and out of the ordinary but of course you didn't either. You have to leave behind the place you've been pretty much your whole life, all the friends you've made and start over for a whole year. If you can sacrifice why can't I? Why do I feel like this whole thing is about me? Like i'm the one who has to move? Probably because you're damn near apart of me so I feel like a part of me is moving away? who knows... We've both had so many thoughts run through our heads in the past month its crazy. You've told me shii that I probably wouldn't even expect from D.nick maybe because I was talking to Domo... or was it V-Dub? lol shii idk but I do know it feels good to know we can count each other with anything. Haha I just aimed you hoping for one of those late night talks again and for the first time you were actually sleep... shocker!!! No need to tell you what i'm going to miss about you'll hear it all in the song I did for you. I took advice from everyone I could and they all told me the same thing Stay Strong and keep in touch with him think positive and all I wanna say is nigga you don't know how i'm feeling inside who are you too help me? lmao naw i'm just kidding I played it smart and took advice to people who went through the same thing before so I know i'll be alright and I know you will to. You know I keep some of the realest people in my circle because some said they would even take me to visit you... crazy rii? Shii I know you'll be back so let me stop simping haha. uhh yeah well ily and lemme end this before the tears start rolling.

P.S. Troublesome Domo Stay out of trouble in STL lol

LMAO SOUTH PARK IS CLASSIC.

Just one of the numerous songs I like from this show.
Wendy's Word song when audtioning for the crews boy band.

Crazy (_!_) Dreams Possibly Turned Realistic Nightmares =/

Man Its 8 A.M. on a Sunday.
Usually I would not be up but I can't ever go back to sleep,
after having a couple crazy but, possibly futuristic dreams
based on realistic events. Well its not that I can't but I
really choose not too. I'll start off with telling you the first dream.
Ok so I attend Carson Highschool, and I am in this program entitled A.S.A.
(for those who want to know what the acronym means it is Advanced Studies Academy)
Now my school is very diverse and you can simply attend CHS and notice the diversity but for some reason in A.S.A. I actually get the feel of it.

There is majority filipinos, there's cuban, there's samoan, there's asian(but I think I should qualify that as filipino because of what one of my filipino/asian friends told me)and then there's mexicans and then you have your selection of black kids which in each grade is only about 5 kids. Now I'd hate to look at things like this but hey can't block out reality but I honestly think the black children have to work harder to prove themselves which I feel is unfair. I feel like I shouldn't have to prove myself to anybody you should just accept me as I am. But in this program we get the typical stereotypes that we don't attempt to do our work or some shii so its like we have to work twice as harder. Thing is at first I thought it was jusst me who felt this way but it's not because I've talked to like 3 other black kids in the program and they feel the same.

But anyways back to the dream so this filipino girl(I won't put any names out there) that I have never had a problem with, I mean seriously we have worked on a couple of group projects together in classes I've never had a problem with her, but then out of no where she decides to flip. So it starts off with me sitting in a chair then something happens and the table falls over and Idk but I think I go to pick my things that fell on the floor up and pick the table back up and I come back and the girl is in my seat so I say I was sitting there but its cool no big deal then she gets smart and was like you can move to another spot so I look at her like wtf excuse me? then like 5 mins later we in each other faces and i'm like wtf is your problem before you was acting all nice and shii like you liked me and she starts yelling like I never liked you so I push her back and I'm like get the f'k out my face like I was literally ready to whoop her (_!_). But after that all I can remember is someone moving me away from the situation. Idk if she was tripping over the race thing or if she was just simply turning into another one of the worlds average fake female. Either way I can't stand either of those things. One I don't even like visiting my grandfather because of his racist mentality towards just everybody. The things I hear when I am around him are rediculous. My father is always stressing that I need to see him more but I just feel I don't need to be around people like that. Just Friday my dad was getting mad talking about I need to know the story as to why he is like that But I feel like it wouldn't make a difference of me knowing the story because it wouldn't change the fact that his mentality is the way it is. Two I don't have many female friends just for the simple fact that things like this can happen.

The other wierd part about the dream was that I don't get into much conflict so for me to just flip over something like this was like wow. But I mean if it does happen and I react like this now I won't be shocked. Can't say I didn't see it coming =/

Dream 2: Ok so dream two wasn't a long dream just for the simple fact that I purposely woke my self out of my own sleep because I didn't want to go any further in the dream. A while back I told you about my role-models becoming friends again and squashing all the problems they had. Well apparently everything that should have been said before wasn't so all of that came out at the wrong place and wrong time and lets just say they're back at "being cool on each other again" for those who know what that means. For those that don't it simply means i'm backing off of you for a period of time and letting you have your space basically i'm done with everything about you. (Note they've had about a 15 yr. friendship) (Sidenote these are two people I look up too so of course seeing them act the way they are has some affect on me)So basically since it's happening for the second time, this time i've just been trying to block out the fact that it is happening and continuing to keep my focus hoping that eventually like the last time eventually this will all just blow over and they will continue to be friends. Well the dream I had like I said was short because I ended it intentionally. But it basically was me asking Role-Model #1 if role-model #2 hadn't died what would she go back and change before the beef. That right there was enough for me I jumped out of my sleep almost in a cold sweat and with this crazy gut feeling and tears sliding down my face.(Also note that I am not much of a cryer I have to be beyond pissed or it really has to be something serious) This was something serious because I don't ever want to have to imagine the fact of losing someone who I built up this close bond with. I mean it's happened to me before and it was the worst feeling ever knowing that you couldn't do anything about it because once they're gone they're just gone. Then I wouldn't even know how to react if I did have to ask that question to anybody after hearing the answer which is part of the reason I woke myself up. Thing is I can usually go to either one of my role-models and tell them what's going on or one of my problems but this is a problem I can't go to either one of them with. Because I can't tell role-model #2 that I had a dream about her dying thats just not something you go to people with randomly and putting all these types of worries on and then I can't go to Role-Model #1 with this because lord knows how she would react. Like I said once someone is gone they're gone and there is nothing you can do about it but for some reason I feel like when I have dreams like this it is God trying to show and tell you something, idk maybe a sign that you can do something about it before it happens to turn out to be de ja vu'. Thing is I don't know how to go about doing something about it because lord knows I don't want shii to end up like this. This is simply that message that Don't let the simplest things in a friendship escalate into this hectic problem because you never know if you will get that chance to patch things up again. Things can end before you least expect it and then one day it will be too late.

I'm hoping that neither one of these dreams turn into reality because I can't deal with this shii. I need suggestions ya'll really for dream #2! What do you suggest that I do to prevent this from happening. What I mean is what do you suggest I do to help them end they're little beef before shii ends up like that and its too late? Things didn't hit me until now because now I feel like I have to deal with it instead of trying to act like it didn't happen. If you're reading this hit me on aim and let me know or drop a comment.

Responsibility

Man i'm about to tell ya'll now as soon as you hit 18 nothing is easy anymore. I thought that was when the fun started but not at all. I'm glad i'm being exposed to these things at age 16 so I know what to expect. I went out on my day off from school to run errands with my role model a.k.a. my window buster by choice just to see how things work. First we started off by going to pay her taxes and so that she could recieve her income tax back. So we went to H&R block you've probably seen a commerical by them I know I have thats the only way I recognized where we were at.

Ok so we get there and they gets this old woman who looks like she shouldn't even be working anymore to assist us. So she's looking over my role models paperwork and she's all like oh you're in school you know how old women do that grandma voice so I try not to burst out in laugher so I quietly laugh and my role model gives me this look and is kind of laughing to and she's just like we gone fight in the car but I judged the woman too soon because she turned out to be a blessing so word of advice today don't judge a book by its cover or simply in this case a woman by her appearance lol but we find out that last year when my role-model paid her taxes a woman named Sheryll who now works for some school(i'm giving you this info so you can track her down and kick her nagas lol j.k.) told her that if she uses her card that she would recieve more money back or how they use it in laymens terms she would recieve more income tax but little did my role-model know that she was ripping her off because she received less money when she could have had 100$ more so being that this year my role-model was paying her taxes on her own she learned something new thanks to the woman who was helping us this time and all she has to do is wait for like a month for them to mail her the money and she gets over 600 dollars in the mail so even with having a job although they take money out of your paycheck you do recieve something back but still probably not as much as they take out but hey its something. But yeah this lady was real nice and because my role-model has a good job is going to school and supporitng herself but made the mistake of putting two people on her envision paper(I think thats what its called) she was only supposed too put one so next year when she puts one she will recieve even more money so word of advice people if you are only supporting your self put that on your paper when you fill it out for your job but yeah I learned some things from that experience. Then we had to go pick up her transcripts from her old highschool narbonne which she has too pay 5$ dollars for then we had to go get her a new license from the dmv which we have to stand in this long line and she has to pay 23$ for recieving a new license then we have to go to her current school harbor also where my two best friends go but accept the highschool and we went to the college so she could see about her financial aid where we have to stand in another long line so after this whole experience plus the experience where I told you we went to the post office and had to stand in that line I'm really not enthusiased about growing up any longer because all it is is standing in a bunch of lines and paying for a bunch of crap that you need to get by like man I do not want to do this lol This just makes me look up to her even more because she has to go through this crap on a weekly basis and i'm like man this crap is tiring. So my fellow peers still in highschool enjoy life while you can because it only gets more complicated as you proceed down the road to success or failure which ever one you are going for. Me i'm going for success so all this responsibilty bull comes along with it sheesh. smh. (*sigh*) this is going to be a long road.

Prozpect

Man if he were still here he would truly be the future of this hip hop shii. Notice how he drops punchline after punchline after punchline. This is the true meaning of 150 bars. R.I.P. Armand.

150 Bars - Prozpect

Celebrity Mania

Ok so last week and this weekend has been celebrity mania crazy. I have been noticing a lot of stuff going on between several celebrities in a short period of time. Last week it started off with Soulja Boy and Bow Wow Beefing.

It all starts when Soulja Boy addresses Bow Wow inviting him to race lamborghinis and telling him to put a pink slip up.


Bow Wow responds with his video showing his car and has a tad bit of a disrespectful remark saying he can fit his whole career in his back tire.


Soulja Boy responds seeming not really bothered by it but does come back with his own bit of research saying Bow Wows car is rented.


Bow Wow then goes harder on Soulja Boy constantly running his mouth taking things to seriously and blowing it out of proportion and this is when things heat up.


This is an attempt of Bow Wow trying to squash the beef he flared up.


Of Course it is too late because Soulja Boy has already released his diss track.


This is the last video before the beef is squashed with Bow Wow still going hard and whm appears to be his "goons" in the background lmao like what was the point of that idk but seems like he's trying to become all big and bad as he gets older but I can't really say nothing because soulja boy always has people in the background of his videos. Then he drops his diss track.


2hrs. later after Soulja Boy releases his diss track Bow Wow releases his pre-recorded diss track.


And after a week they end the beef over the phone like wtf?

Find more videos like this on ThisIs50.com : IF IT'S HOT IT'S HERE!

Of course they took their videos off their personal youtube pages but of course you have other people who got a hold of them before it was all squashed because they must have forgot they are famous and once you release something to the public its out there so its not totally gone off the net even if you do take it down. Duhh. And of course they did interviews in between beefing but i'm not about to post them so go youtube it.

Other Celebrity troubles were with olympic gold medalist and swimmer Michael Phelps. Whoever he was getting high with publicly released the picture of him smoking weed through a bong. I don't see anything wrong with it but the only mistake he made was smoking with the wrong person and they stabbed him in the back releasing the photo out into the media. So word of advice watch who you smoke with. Other than that I feel the same way that Andy Milonakis does.



The next big Celebrity thing took place in Los Angeles over the weekend which everyone and their mommas have been talking about the whole Chris Brown and Rihanna situation. I have to say a lot of people have been taking sides but so far here is the story behind it.
Chris Brown Rihanna situation
Rumors also have it that he slapped her because she gave him an STD, possibly herpes and that he was under the influence of alcohol when he slapped her so i'd say if it was true which idk then it would be a perfect explanation as to why he slapped her because he was drunk and alcohol influences you to do things you wouldn't normally do if you were sober hence the phrase "drunken words are sober thoughts" but either way this was a bad buisness move for Chris because he is now currently losing money from previous advertisements he was doing. Another update is that supposedly they had already broke up and that he was seeing the new actor Michelle something(I forget her last name) who plays aaliyah in that new movie and I guess she was there when the argument happened and the police took her in for about 6hrs. of questioning. But even though they had already broke up they were going to put on a front just for the performance at the grammys and then figure out how to break the whole thing off to the public and media.

But while all this was going on I recieved somewhat of a chain letter which was hilarious so you know I had to share it with everybody lol

0Look, This is the real mutha fuckin story of chris and rihanna ;It was raining and rihanna was like chris get under my "umbrella" ella ella aye aye and he was like naah I'll just "run it " back to the car so I won't get wet chris felt like rihanna was taking "foreever", so they got back to the car and chris was like "gimme that"umbrella and she was like "shutup and drive" then chris was like girl you finna have "no air" and rihanna was like that's why I'm "unfaithful" to you nd chris slammed her from "wall to wall" LMMFA0

Then last but not least what was supposed to have been DJ KHALED in a highspeed pursuit chase. Ok So i'm watching George Lopez like I do every night same time same place my room 11 'o' clock to 12 'o' clock and I hate when my shows get cut off because of breaking news like man. So its some guy in a chase so I think nothing of it because people are in these all the time especially in the hood lol they have like helicopters out there daily and cops too. So I was typing my essay didn't really feel like getting up to turn off the tv but then the driver in the chase pulls over and just stops and for like 5-10 mins he is just sitting there and they are just filming it so I get annoyed and find it pointless so I finally cut off the television. Then like 10 minutes later I get an aim from my window buster like are you still up i'm like yeah she's like do you see the highspeed chase i'm like yeah I saw it but it interrupted my show so I got mad and turned it off and she's like they say its DJ KHALED so i'm like dang for real so I turn the tv back on and simply nice timing because as I do that they show a picture of the guy and I'm like dang look just like him and so he's just sitting in the car still and news reporters are saying it appears to be terror squad member Dj Khaled as in CAH-LEAD so they pronouncing his name all wrong but yet trying to do it all proper lol so I just laughed but I was like dang whats wrong with celebrities this weekend and it was in Universal City so i'm like sheesh must be something about California that have celebrities going crazy this weekend. But again the chase was taking to long and even the news cut it off. But while all this was going on apparently dude had a gun to his head attempting suicide but the news cut it off so I was left lingering on as to what would happen. So this morning at school I get an aim from my window buster and apparently it wasn't Dj Khaledd(Dang news reporters can't even get their facts straight remember when making assumptions you can make an "ass" out of yourself lol) But it was sad because apparantley dude did go through and commit suicide and apparantley it was because of a relationship gone wrong. Now this was all kind of a wierd coincidence because before this happened me and my window buster was just talking about relationships and what she learned in her college sex class that also has to do with relationships and she was telling me how those last four years she spent in the relationship focusing on her ex it was time to get back focusing on her self. Then today when I found out the cause I was like dang isn't this wierd and then she was telling me yeah and even she felt like that when she was in her relationship to the point where she almost wanted to hurt herself because of love because letting go is hard and sometimes your emotions take over you almost to a point where you can't control your feelings and I couldn't agree more because I see it happen all the time to people in relationships where they are constantly taking someone back who has caused them so much hurt all because they are afraid to let go and for this man who wasn't dj khaled but apparently mustafa mustafa it all came to a tragic and unfortunate ending because his feelings still had the best of him and the police chase didn't help the situation at all. All this being said people be smart there are several fish out there in the sea and it is not the end of the world when one relationship comes to an end don't be afraid to let go it will be hard but its all a part of life letting go might be the hardest part but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and the next relationship will be easier to bare with. Your life is more important than anything else.

Not a good clip but I thought it was more interesting to see it up close and personal





The downfall of being a celebrity is that the media forces this thing on you as to where you are forced to maintain a posiitve image even if thats not what you want to do. You no longer have privacy any more when you are famous. So many people forget that trying to make their way to the top its rediculous but you have to remember that because popparatzi, hip hop police, and media are all looking for ways to bring you down in a split second so with all this being said just be careful with what you do and say out in public and even in the privacy of your own home you have to know the people you are around well enough because it is hard too trust anybody in this generation thats why me personally I prefer to only trust myself but there are that selection that I give some amount of trust but not my all because like I said at the end of the day people change and become backstabbers don't believe me? observe some of the actions of your friends and see if they downtalk any of their friends to you and then turn around and act like none of it ever happened. Then come back and tell me if you have real friends or not.

2.7.88

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO A VERY SPECIAL WOMAN IN MY LIFE.
I SAY WOMAN BECAUSE SHE IS NOW 21 AND HAS THE QUALITY TRAITS OF A WOMAN.
OVER THE PAST THREE YEARS I HAVE SEEN HER PROGRESS SO MUCH ITS CRAZY.
I REMEMBER LATE NIGHTS WHEN YOU WOULD WORK AT MACY'S AND WE WOULD AIM EACH OTHER,
JUST TO MAKE YOUR SHIFT GO BY FASTER, AND THEN YOU WOULD STOP BY AFTER YOU GOT OFF AND I WOULD BE KNOCKED AND YOU WOULD HAVE CARONE WAKE ME UP AND COME OUTSIDE
AT LIKE 12 A.M. LOL.
THEN I REMEMBER WHEN YOU STARTED WORKING AT THAT OLD PEOPLE HOME LOL AND I SAID I WASN'T COMING TO HELP YOU WORK UP THERE.
NOW LOOK AT YOU A PHLEBOTOMIST A.K.A. NURSE RONI.
I CAN'T PUT INTO WORDS HOW PROUD OF YOU I AM.
I REMEMBER WHEN YOU WAS STRUGGLING TRYNA PAY FOR YOUR BOOKS AND FEES FOR COLLEGE.
NOW ITS NOT EVEN A PROBLEM. YOU DEFOCATING ON FEMALES PUTTING THEY LIFES TO SHAME BECAUSE EVEN BEFORE THE AGE OF 21 YOU HAD A GOOD JOB, A CAR, GOING TO SCHOOL AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS. HOW MANY FEMALES AT AGE 21 CAN SAY THEY HAVE ALL OF THAT IN THIS GENERATION? I HAVEN'T SEEN ANY YET.
YOU'VE SHOWN ME THAT ITS OK FOR SOMEONE TO STRUGGLE,
BECAUSE IN THE END THE HARD WORK PAYS OFF.
BEEN JUST LIKE AN OLDER SISTER TOO ME, FROM PICKING ME UP AFTER SKEWL,
TO STOPPING BY MY HOUSE WHENEVER I NEEDED A LAUGH, OR JUST TO GET SOME PROBLEMS
OFF MY CHEST, OR WHEN I JUST WANTED TO SHOW YOU MY REPORT CARDS LOL
I TRULY APPRECIATE EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE FOR ME.
EVEN WHEN YOU YELL AT ME, MEL AND TYLER FOR JACKING CARS LOL
I KNOW ITS ONLY BECAUSE YOU WANT THE BEST FOR US.
THESE PAST 3-4 YRS. W/ YOU,
MEASURE UP TO A LIFETIME.
YOU'VE BECOME A PIECE OF MY HEART, SOMETHING LIKE A BLOOD FLOW
KEEPING ME GOING EVERYDAY. I'M GOING TO END IT LIKE THIS,
ILY W/ ALL MY HEART AND WERE GOING TO ENJOY THE MEMORIES OF TODAY AND
ALL THE YEARS TOO COME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VERONICA DANIELLE WILLIAMS
A.K.A. MY WINDOW BUSTER,
A.K.A. MY ROLE MODEL.

My Adidas

Well I don't know about the shoes, not really my style but the video and the song is dope sort of brings back that 80's flavor. The style of this song is different from the song he did with e-40 entitled dego back when I was in 9th grade. I used to be on that song lol

CBS x Weezy F.

Been listening to this man's music Since the day's I first rode in Krystal's Black Malibu. Ever Since She was banging the Carter up to Carter 2 up to Like Father Like Son up to Dedication 2 up to Drought 3 up to Carter 3 to just mixes and more. As long as I was riding in her car I didn't have a choice lol So even when his voice got annoying to me I couldn't do anything but listen. You can see his style has changed a lot over the years. I'm not saying I like everything this man puts out but there is people that do so it really doesn't matter unless you were one of those Lil Wayne bandwagon hoppers who just hopped on him when he dropped Drought 3 and everybody started putting his lyrics in their away and it was just like wow okay shows you how people jump on trends and he has been a trend setter because most of the things you see him do you will see one of those bandwagon hoppers do from them big scarfs he wraps around his neck to the tattoos all over. But one thing I can say I like about this man is that including this one from every interview I have seen with him you can tell that he doesn't hold back he keeps it 100% on telling you how he feels everytime so I have to give it to him on that one because a lot of people today like to beat around the bush and are just afraid to be themselves and thats where the bandwagon hoppers come in. To me a bandwagon hopper is just someone who can't find who they are as a person, which is why ever since I created a name for myself "FLY CAYLA" i've found out who I am as a person and started doing what I wanted to and what was cool in my eyes not what was cool in everybody elses eyes and then me thinking its cool because it's hyped up. Even my parents get frustrated sometimes because I'm not the type of female they want me too be in their eyes but I tell them like I tell everybody else I'm not your average female, I'm not somebody else, I am me, the only life i'm living is mine whether people accept it or not. So I agree with his last quote if you need an example of how to live then you simply shouldn't have been born.

STOP SLEEPING ON THE VANS STORE!!!

No on second thought disregard the title caption,
just so I can get all the Dope Shii lmao
YEP HOW SELFISH OF ME! OH WELL iNEVER GAVE 2 HOT F'KS.
STRAIGHT LIKE THAT. YEE.

To Get List

SoOoO recently i've noticed I want a lot of things, so yesterday I figured I might as well make a to get list. I work hard in school and in life lol I save my own money and treat myself to whatever I want, I wanted that tupac skateboard and guess what GOT IT iWanted that Lasonic i931 Boombox and guess what? GOT IT. so yeah this is why I can't wait ti'll I get rich because things will be easier then I can just go on random shopping sprees. SoOo next up on my to get list:

Louis V Backpack. So exclusive... which one should I get?



Blue edition?


Or Stick with the Classic?


also on my list: mic (coming soon), Supras (possibly coming soon)

SoOoO any takers to help me get these items? NOPE? I didn't think so all ya'll some acryllic mofo's so selfish just thinking bout ya' self lmao j.k but yeah idk how soon these things are coming but if I don't lose my interest I'm copping them one step at a time. I put my eyes on the prize and what do you know a few days later imma Champion lol

Gray Skies

Have you ever payed attention to something random,
and then just went into deep thought about it?
well I did, on my way to the doctor this evening
I payed attention to the gray sky and clouds and rain.
I noticed how there was one big combined gray cloud,
and little by little the clouds were breaking apart,
and moving on to some place else, and this usually occurs
right after it stops raining. Made me think about how all
over the world, people go through dark situations, and cry
about it constantly until one day they have to slowly move
away from that situation and find there own way. And overall
what I got from this whole thing is that too me rainy days
now symbolizes a day to move on. Crazy how I can get all this
from just looking at the sky right?

No More Math Analysis.

SoOoO throughout this whole first semester,
as you guys know I was studying with this class.
Fail after Fail after Fail and lord knows I tried,
getting people to help me study, studying on my own,
taking several make-up tests and it just didn't work out.
But my teacher saw how I consistent I was to try and pass,
so the day after the final he posts the final grades up and
I already was nervous and discouraged like man if I go look up there
and I see another F this is just gone mess my whole day up,
but I looked anyway and what did I see, an A? no, a B? no a C? not quite ya average, a D? HA! iWish. yep you guessed it! an F for 500 Alex! so yeah my pride wouldn't
let me show it but I was torn up inside like f'k man(note this was my first time
failing a class) so I got other work to do, so I start working on my english
hw, and popped in my ipod to put a blockade on every possible noise but 5 mins later
the teacher wants to talk to me outside the class, so he starts off like I went in and tried to see what I could do and even if I changed all your tests to 70 i see it wouldn't have done anything (at this time i'm thinking oh geesh how encouraging *sarcasm*) he says and I see how you've been making an effort showing up everyday and taking all the make-up tests so i'm going to go ahead and give you the D because I see you have been trying and showing up and all of that does count for something its not a C but it gets you the credits. I know up there on the board it says F but i'm giving you the D so what that says means nothing. Then he justs asks me have I talked to my counsler and says that he talked to her and as far as that goes I might have to switch out of that class so yeah. But I guess this means even if it doesn't seem like it at the end of the day hard work pays off majority of the time. SoOo yeah =)

Stuffed French Toast

So I just got back from ihop,
and I ordered this bomb Stuffed French Toasst.
It looked appealing to me because French toast is
one of my favorite breakfast foods and strawberries
are my favorite fruits and I was right I ordered it and
I was satisfied. Along with it came a hash brown, scrambled eggs
(which I don't reccomend)
and some bomb sausages mann them sausages was good.
But what does this have to do with anything you ask?
Absolutely nothing but I enjoyed that meal. =)